Twilight

WAHHHHHHHHHH
Wow third time I've read a book within a day,
and this time its not from the HP series!

Oh man. I don't remember much of the book, probably due to the 1.5 hours of sleep I got last night.

Yeah... couldn't sleep, so I decided to partition and rearrange my hard drive (cause tonight... err morning, is the morning, when 1 become 2 =) till 6 am, and got up at 7:30 am to attend my friend's piano competition. Then I went to square one to meet a friend that couldn't make it, had the whopper deal, picked up Twilight, and read it from the bus ride home to now.

If chick fli... romantic comedies were to exist as books, Twilight would be the counterpart. And I giggled through the whole book like a little girl. Pretty sure the bus driver thought I was crazy.

See, God created the world in seven days, for in the seventh day, He set an example of resting, which I shall go do in the very near future. Like now. Okay, maybe after a couple of "study cell" sessions LOLZ.

Everything is meaningless,

including marks!
Yeah best excuse for low marks =]. But then again, I think it's pretty valid.

I'm still in my program, average is still high enough to get into teaching option, got a summer job, and I'm still better off than 99% of the people on this planet.

I feel pretty vain sometimes, but thats life isn't it? At least without hope in Christ.

"For what do I have
If I don't have You, Jesus?
What in this life
Could mean any more?
You are my rock
You are my glory
You are the lifter
Of my head
Lifter of this head"
~Cry of My Heart by Starfield

What shall I do today? (Courtesy of Pippi Longstocking)

I got Starfield's new cd today. First thing that hit me was:

"Let me not be blind with privilege
Give me eyes to see the pain
Let the blessing you've poured out on me
Not be spent on me in vain
Let this life be used for change
I will go"
~I Will Go by Starfield

By which I realized the theme of the cd.

The second thing that stuck to me in the car was the difference between Starfield's and Hillsong's version of Hosanna. The Starfield version only has the first half of the bridge, which goes:

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like you have loved me

and in Hillsong's version, is followed by:

Break my heart for what is yours
Everything I am for your kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity

Then I started remembering the news today, of how staples around the world are rising because of the growing of corn for bio-fuels. They were talking about rice in particular, especially in China, although there is also the rise in price of corn in Mexico too, which my grade 12 bio teacher had talked about.
Then there's Darfur, which I still know barely nothing about.

What's new? Disturbed but unmoving, as usual.

Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?"
And I said, "Here am I. Send me!"
~Isaiah 6:8

endurance

Hmm I was surprised that I actually had significant progress on cleaning my room =O. So surprised that I stopped after two days -.-. Man I have to learn endurance; you'll think three assignments a week for eightish months built something up =/.

Attended prayer meeting Wednesday... it's pretty different when everyone's at least 10 years older than you. Two sisters were laughing at my chinese =[ and I almost fell asleep cause it was in cantonese =P. I still got the general message tho! Don't be like Gideon, who basically had this spiritual high in his life, and steadily let it trickle downward for the rest of his life... kinda like his spiritual life settled down. Hmmm I wonder how that relates to me... >.>

Which reminds me of things I still haven't gotten around to learning stuff, now that I have the whole house to myself
like guitar! and cooking! I did learn how to make eggs... that do not permanently become part of the pan. Don't think I even remember how to play anything Jackal taught me >.>. I'm pretty sure I'm having trouble with these things cause it's unlike math =/.

I guess its partly cause I don't like sharing my struggles with anyone in my family; I'm always afraid that I'll have to bring up God for the important stuff I want to discuss about. On Monday's drive back to sauga, my mom brought up how love is the same for every relationship, including between same sex couples, and that it is wrong to say that that's wrong. When I began to disagree, where at this point I didn't even have to reference the bible, as it is obvious there are different kinds of love (exempli gratia: love between parents is different from love between siblings or love between man and God), she quickly responded with, "Of course you say that cause you're Christian." Thanks mom. That effectively increased the radius of my bubble space.

There's this analogy, like Gabriel's distance graph,
where God is at the top corner of a triangle and, for this case, I'm at one of the bottom corners, and my mom is at the other. There are two ways to get closer to each other; either I move along the base and towards mom, or I continue in God's direction and hope my mom does as well. For me, this picture is always a scalene triangle, where my distance from mom is lengthening as I am (hopefully) treading slowly towards God. My happiness level goes down a notch each time this comes to mind. And then I wonder if I even care what happens to mom and to my family. I see them groping in the dark every day.

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.
~1 Corinthians 13:2

second post (will my creativeness never end? =)

yea the sole purpose of this post is for the title

11.8 million seconds left =]

first post (I'm such a creative guy)

yeaa blogging
might as well, since I have a month of free time
plus stalking Joanna's blog made me want to =P
reminds me of xanga
which I haven't touched since forever
took me forever to come up with a url and title for this blog
my decisiveness is like God's love... never ending lolz

sighh... just a bit less than 12 million seconds left till fall term starts!
ha I miss exam period already
never before has studying been so... different
I had so much time to slack =] and people to slack with me!
I'm such a bad influence... moving on =D
I think the most beautiful thing I've seen all year was when Elliot and Vanessa made dinner for everyone... can't really pull out words to say more

God reminded me how much I've missed being myself
wished I joined frosh cell
I miss talking about God... my hunger for something deeper
more than just finishing assignments
worrying about being the influence at both homes
definitely joining welcome team cell group and pre-study next term
time to free myself of the thorns

hmm gotta figure out how to type in chinese on this blog
ah well
back to cleaning room and rubix cubing =]